Piano
Didn't know what the freaking hell has gone into me... I'm terribly hopeless now... Gosh...
I'm sooooo immature now... Damn... I need some stimuli here...
Piano. Something I LOVED when I was young. Then, I had to change to another new teacher because I've moved to a new place. And, that teacher totally sucks. I don't even touch my piano. Not even ONE SINGLE KEY. I still can play quite perfectly by then, with THAT kind of grade. *laughs*
Then, I changed to another teacher because the second teacher totally sucks. *sorries* And this teacher? Yea, she's good, but still not as good as the first one, I think. She have the passion, raging passion towards music - piano. Thanks to her, she kind of brought back the old soul that I used to have.
After a few years, I lost it again. And I'm STILL lost. SHIT. I can die!!! I've paid my examination fees for my grade 8 practical fees. And what I'm doing now? I'm still sticking my buttocks on this old chair, sitting in front of this 15" or 17" LCD monitor, tapping my fingers on this black keyboard instead of the black and white keyboard.
I just got fed up with my playing. Seriously, my playing sucks. I know I'm dissapointing my parents and my teacher AND sorry for myself. Damn. I'm hopeless, cureless... Crap. Sometimes, I'm just wondering, what are the things that made my... spirit drop? I can say, my parents are part of the reasons.
Why? They comment on my playing, although I know they're just giving some suggestions. They kept on telling me that I don't play nice songs because my notes are stiff (no, they don't know anything about instruments), yada yada yada. And the thing I hate most is that sometimes when I'm playing, I just hate people suddenly stand beside me and watch. Hello~~ I'm practising here, I need some private space here. Another thing, I just hate hate HATE that when I'm practising piano, they call my name :" !@^*@$&^*#$^(*&#*$&^!!!!!!" and " bring me this and that!!" or " do this or that for me!!!". LOL. Hello people~~ HELLO~~ You are the ones complaining I didn't touch the piano, but once I put my fingers on it, you call me to do you guys some favours. Now, who's talking?!
Ok, ok... Thought that I'm being sarcastic? Yeah, maybe. I can't blame others, I know.
I just really have to blame myself, for being so-not-disciplined. Seriously... No no... SEVERELY. (Is that how the word spelt?) Gosh... I just don't feel like practising piano. I think my playing sucks, very bad. I feel that I'm making noises when I play it. I feel that I'm disturbing the neighbours, disturbing my parents (and that's why I don't like to play the piano when they're at home). AND, what's more, technology distracted me. I play computer games instead of the piano whenever I have time. I watch the TV instead of touching the piano when I'm free. Gosh... I'm a bad time manager. Very.
I'm running out of time. Exam is getting nearer and nearer. And my playing? Not improving. Am I going to pass? With plenty of luck, and a very very generous examiner, I probably will. Other than that? I'm keeping my fingers crossed.
I'm so damn hopeless. God punish me please. Thank you.
But not with failing my piano exam, ok??
-Jas-
I'm sooooo immature now... Damn... I need some stimuli here...
Piano. Something I LOVED when I was young. Then, I had to change to another new teacher because I've moved to a new place. And, that teacher totally sucks. I don't even touch my piano. Not even ONE SINGLE KEY. I still can play quite perfectly by then, with THAT kind of grade. *laughs*
Then, I changed to another teacher because the second teacher totally sucks. *sorries* And this teacher? Yea, she's good, but still not as good as the first one, I think. She have the passion, raging passion towards music - piano. Thanks to her, she kind of brought back the old soul that I used to have.
After a few years, I lost it again. And I'm STILL lost. SHIT. I can die!!! I've paid my examination fees for my grade 8 practical fees. And what I'm doing now? I'm still sticking my buttocks on this old chair, sitting in front of this 15" or 17" LCD monitor, tapping my fingers on this black keyboard instead of the black and white keyboard.
I just got fed up with my playing. Seriously, my playing sucks. I know I'm dissapointing my parents and my teacher AND sorry for myself. Damn. I'm hopeless, cureless... Crap. Sometimes, I'm just wondering, what are the things that made my... spirit drop? I can say, my parents are part of the reasons.
Why? They comment on my playing, although I know they're just giving some suggestions. They kept on telling me that I don't play nice songs because my notes are stiff (no, they don't know anything about instruments), yada yada yada. And the thing I hate most is that sometimes when I'm playing, I just hate people suddenly stand beside me and watch. Hello~~ I'm practising here, I need some private space here. Another thing, I just hate hate HATE that when I'm practising piano, they call my name :" !@^*@$&^*#$^(*&#*$&^!!!!!!" and " bring me this and that!!" or " do this or that for me!!!". LOL. Hello people~~ HELLO~~ You are the ones complaining I didn't touch the piano, but once I put my fingers on it, you call me to do you guys some favours. Now, who's talking?!
Ok, ok... Thought that I'm being sarcastic? Yeah, maybe. I can't blame others, I know.
I just really have to blame myself, for being so-not-disciplined. Seriously... No no... SEVERELY. (Is that how the word spelt?) Gosh... I just don't feel like practising piano. I think my playing sucks, very bad. I feel that I'm making noises when I play it. I feel that I'm disturbing the neighbours, disturbing my parents (and that's why I don't like to play the piano when they're at home). AND, what's more, technology distracted me. I play computer games instead of the piano whenever I have time. I watch the TV instead of touching the piano when I'm free. Gosh... I'm a bad time manager. Very.
I'm running out of time. Exam is getting nearer and nearer. And my playing? Not improving. Am I going to pass? With plenty of luck, and a very very generous examiner, I probably will. Other than that? I'm keeping my fingers crossed.
I'm so damn hopeless. God punish me please. Thank you.
But not with failing my piano exam, ok??
-Jas-
Comments
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Maybe you just need a piano partner to rekindle your spirit.
And most prolly the reason as to why people stand beside you when you're playing piano -
they're amazed by your talent. I'll always walk S-L-O-W-L-Y when I pass by houses where there is people practising the piano.
Practising tune =/= Perfect tune.