this is life.

First off, please don't freak out when you read the title. Even though there are times I feel like I'm going to loose myself, but I'm still pretty much sane. Though, of course, I couldn't guarantee that I can stay sane in the future. Why? I just stood a little higher on the stage, and I can feel it. I'm already touching the line. I'm going to cross that line, very soon. Oh yes this is so freaking me out. Those who read this, please don't freak out. You're doing me a favour. I'm saying all these not to let those who read this worry. I'm saying all these is merely for my own sake. Blogging, after all is a way for me to pour out and put them into words. Make them not vague, slightly vague, or totally vague. I'm happy to be a Scorpion. Thank you for the gifted, inborn mysteriousness. I caught myself crying for no reason. I'm not feeling sad. I'm not feeling upset. I'm not feeling angry. I'm feeling nothing. But I cried. I'm be...

... is a form of love? Not always. Another realization. Hatred will remain as hatred towards some people who are just worthless. True? Oh-so-true. -Jas-

... is a form of love, too. I never knew this. Not until after her death. I was surprised. -Jas-

对啦对啦。。。 就是给小爱感染到，要用中文来跟新部落各。 （哗。。偶竟然会酱多华语字野！） 虽然我是讨厌中文，可是有些感觉还是用中文比较好表达。 所谓的有 feel 嘛~ 最近大家都有一些私人问题。。。有些困扰。 大家一起加油吧! 等一等时间的魔术，将烦死我们的事情都冲走！ （对啦。。。是有点梦幻啦。。。） 我只想说，也许最近我有点不敏感，有点忽略了谁谁谁的。。。 对不起噢。。。 不知道哪来的，莫名其妙的感觉。 感觉累了。 想要静静的，做一做有一点静的人，有一点不关心别人的人。 现在好想睡觉。。。 就讨厌生病会酱的时候。 想睡可是又不能睡。 去啦，可恶的上课时间。 -Jas-

Ahh... Its been another long while since I've updated here eh? Even blogging, needs good timing. Too many things that I wanted to say, yet when I typed the title, I already don't feel like blogging. Or, the time that I desperately needed to let it out and blog is just not right (no internet, no PC.) Right before I switch off all the lights in my room, and decided to stretch my sleepy eyes a little longer for the heck of blogging, the title and things that I had in mind to blog about is way different from what I have in mind now. Talking about spontaneity. Or probably the "ah-ha" moment as Ms Winnee says it all the time? Ah, sorry for all the crap again. Seven more minutes until midnight, until 4th of June. No, I'm not posting this blog for the sake of YooChun's birthday. I have my own limits of idolization and day dreams. LOL. *cough* During dinner, my mom was telling me this: 19th of June's a Thursday. I was somewhat, confused. I couldn't believe that...

Wheee~ this time I'm tagged by a forum friend, Ikaru ~ ^^ Shall we get the balls rollin? 1. Write the title of your memoirs using 6 words. 2. Post it on your blog. 3. Link to the person that you tagged. 4. Tag 5 more blogs. Here goes: Life, love, friends, family, music & YooChun. Life It is always unpredictable, it is always uncontrolable, it is always full of sadness and happiness, it is always full of love and hatred, this is life. The longer I live, the more I discover. Learning about life is like reading a book without an ending. Not until the day you die, that is where your chapter will end. Love Something that every human being in this world yearn for. May it be from family, friends, or a special someone. May it be from objects, pets or an interest. Love is something that constantly keeps lives going, keeps hearts from staying strong. However, it is to be taken note that love is not an object. Love is not everything in life. Love is just part of life. Friends Friends are ...

What could be happier than bumping into an old friend you've never met ever since you graduated highschool? (Okay so there ARE things happier than that, but STILL!!!) Yes, I happen to bump into an old friend of mine yesterday. It was VERY surprising, considering the fact that I've never thought that I would bump into him at the commuter station. What's more? THAT commuter station. *laughs* I had to say, I was extremely happy that I get to meet him. LOL! At first I was thinking: Who's this frigging guy sitting so near to me when I'm burrying my head into my book...? What the heck this guy wants eh? *plannings to deal with the guy if there's some skeptical move* And then? The "stranger" just said: OOI! I looked up and stare at him with my eyes widen to the max and replied: OOOOOIIIIII!!!!!!! (yeah I know you guys can totally imagine my reaction. haha!) *cough*i'mnotatmymainpointofmypostyet*cough* A few days back, while I was driving and parking at so...

Been keeping my TVXQ! songs aside for a few days, weird huh? I think I'll need to bring out some of those chinese, cantonese and english songs that I have in my list to refresh some memories. Weird that I actually overcome my TVXQ! fangirlism?? Ahahahha... WRONG! xD Oh I'm still much head over heels with those guys~ However, if I "consume" too much TVXQ! nutrients, it won't do me any good too~ (Yeah just like FOOD. xD Ahahahha~~) Here's my all time favourite song ever since I was seven years old~ Now and Forever (sang by Richard Marx) Whenever I'm weary from the battles that rage in my head You make sense of madness when my sanity hangs by a thread I lose my way but still you seam to understand Now and forever I will be your man Sometimes I just hold you Too caught up in me to see I'm holding a fortune that heaven has given to me I'll try to show you each and every way I can Now and forever I will be you man Now I can rest my worries and always be ...

I do not miss this feeling. Not at all. As much as I wanted it to go away, it comes. If only I can wrap it up, and throw it away like a piece of rubbish... I would have done that a long, long time ago. Too bad, it's already part of me. Good thing? I accept the reality. Bad thing? I accept the reality. Contradicting? Probably. It's getting a little harder to control. And now, I've reached a different kind of understanding, a different kind of empathy. Good thing? I understand others more. Bad thing? I became a stranger to myself. Contradicting? Maybe. A stage was built for me to step on. I've never came down from it, and I believe I cannot even get myself down. All I can do is...? There is an answer, but there would not be an absolute solution. It might be the stage which made me stand taller, but it is the stage that no one wants it in their lives. Vague, maybe? No. -Jas-

Haha, not exactly sure if I'm tagged~ Since I'm in the midst of boredom, stress-dom and procrastinating-dom... I'll do the taggy thingy~ xD *steals from Luc* Name 5 people you can think of right off the top of your head.Don't read the questions underneath until you write the names of all 5people.This is a lot funnier if you actually randomly list the names first..NO CHEATING! 1) Kar Mun 2) Sarah 3) Mika 4) Gorgan 5) "Sexy" dear xD DONT READ AHEAD UNLESS U FILLED THE TOP 1. How did you meet 1? (Kar Mun) >> WHOA! seriously i remember this! the very first time i met her, was at main block, lower foyer, where she asked me about the orientation thingy (because she came in a week late, there's no more orientation). and THEN we bumped into each other in the bus, and then? we cliqued! xD *side notes* honey, this is FATE ehh? *lmao* 2. On a scale of 1 -10 how would u rate your friendship with 1?(Kar Mun) >> Hmmmm... i'd say... 8 i guess! 3. how long...

Hmm... Honestly speaking, I was so dreadful to blog a couple of hours ago. I wanted to rant this freaking thing that's within my superego (?) and which is leaking its way towards my ego (*cough* psychological term, mind you). But after some light chats with my up-to-date-who's-not-acting-like-her-age aunt, I'm feeling better. However, that doesn't mean that the problem(s) is (/are) solved. Oh well, I'll see how far my limit is. Since I've been saying this for quite a long time: I'm already standing at the edge of my cliff, and I will fall anytime. Hah! I'll see when I fall. *coughs* Again, back to the topic people. *waves* I've already mentioned the same topic some time ago... I was wondering to myself: what is/are my talent(s)? Recently, I'm being a little bit optimistic (or probably you can say I'm being rather realistic... LOL). I told myself this: Jasmine, you have talents! As cheesy as it might sound, but that's what I thought about ...

Probably SOME of you who see this title might be smirking. GO ON AND SMIRK. Haha~~ So yeah... When I was in the bus with a couple of friends, we talked about this *cough* issue. Some friends are like diamonds, precious and hard to find. Some friends are like fallen leaves, could be found everywhere. Hmm... to me... I wouldn't say a good friend is like a diamond. Diamonds could be very precious and rare; however, to me... they are... USELESS. Yep. You don't need me to repeat that right? LOL. I've written in RED, and BOLDED it to let you see it nice and clear. Diamonds are only meant for LOOKING at, for ACCESSORIZING. Tell me how useful is that eh? Put there, and do nothing. And you have to spend like a rather big sum of money to buy whatever how many karats of it. Personally, I think it's really silly. *hinthintYOOCHUNAHhinthint* xD Also, I'd say LEAVES are WAAAAAAAYYYYY more useful than diamonds. At least they are biodegradeable and something useful to mother earth...

Hmm... Currently, I'm feeling soooo tired. =__= I just came back from University, LOL. And my right ear is being gay... Gah... Fine fine fine, lemme just go deaf and cut all the lovely melodies from my world. I've been a really good girl, for real! Yes I do listen to MP3, but I never turn on the volume too loudly until people meters away from my could hear what song I'm listening to. (I turn on like.. AT MOST volume 10 out of 30 of my MP3.) I don't listen to it everyday. The LONGEST time I listen to it is for two hours straight, MAXIMUM LENGTH. Been sooo stressed out with the weird feeling of me ear, ended up to spend 15 bucks to do what? Yes pay a visit to this cute female doctor, and she took out A SHORT HAIR from my right ear. And also for ear droplet thingy, because there's still.. a short one (hair) in there near to my eardrums... LOL. Seriously cute, the doctor I meant~ Haha~~ She's like looking into both of my ears and said: oh dear, you ears are sooo cl...

Honestly, I didn't know what title I wanted to put. AND apparently? I forgot what I wanted to blog about. Sweat eh? There's something I wanted to talk about... regarding people (duh eh? haha~) but it'll take a long time, and I'm in the midst of missing "lala land" and meeting Yoochun there at the moment... Gah, this is one rubbish post~ Because I totally forgot the "essence" I wanted to put in here... Oh well... I gotta remind myself to do other important stuffs tomorrow!! Assignments, presentation AND final exam! ALL THE BEST TO YOU PEOPLE!! And oh! To those who did meh tag~ thankies! xD Haha~ -Jas-

True about what? That there IS a problem there. -Jas-

Thanks to Aaron, I got tagged! LOLness! Oh well, I've been wanting to update, but I wasn't sure what I wanted to talk about. Anyhoooo, here goes! Instructions : Remove ONE question from below, and add in your personal question, make it a total of 20 questions, then tag 8 people in your list, list them out at the end of this post. Notify them in their chat box that he/she has been tagged. Whoever does the tag will have blessings from all. 1. What's your favorite anime at the present time? % whoa, tough question... I'm hooked back to SAILORMOON . xD 2. Given the chance, what special ability/power would you like to have? % being able to be invisible sometimes~ *winks* 3. How do you think about yourself? % a person who gives dissapointments to others who have expectations on me. 4. Where is the place that you want to go the most? % for now?? U.S.A.!!!! i hope daddy will lemme go this coming long break... 5. If you can have 1 dream to come true, what would it be? % another t...

I don't like this... The feeling is back again... I don't like it at all... Its something, a part of me, a down side of me that is yet to be discovered. I don't like this feeling at all. _____________________________________________________________________________ When you realized that that part of you, isn't a part of you from the start... Just makes you wonder: How much do you worth? -Jas-

Yeah go on and LAUGH your *SS off if you want at the title. I can't stop you anyway. I just know I have to STOP procrastinating, just teeny weeny bit and my life will just get easier. Oh well... *sigh* I'm still trying hard to push myself a little harder. I've been thinking a little much recently though. But now... I can't remember what I wanted to blog about. LOL. Hmm... What I'm thinking? Probably what life's all about, what human being's all about, what being ALIVE is all about. Sometimes I felt that life is just something... no... nothing. Because no matter what you do, at the end of the day, you're still you. What you do now is just to fulfill your feelings, your needs and other needs. Yeah I'm not making any sense. Oh... Another thing I thought about that I remembered. Environment. Yeah... I thought about it myself. I told myself (even until today) if I'm not a psychologist, I'll be an environmentalist. I couldn't stand looking out ...

The Influence of Birth Order My Result: Only child because of your achievement People who stand out as only children due to their achievements usually received good grades in school or felt afraid of disappointing their parents if their grades weren't high. As adults they probably believe that educational success and career advancement are important in life. In fact, in comparison to their peers, they're likely to attain higher educational levels and occupy more prestigious positions in the workplace. Their tendency to be efficient and open to constructive criticism are qualities that contribute to their success in life. Odds are that they are naturally competitive and like to compare their abilities to others. For this reason, they are likely to enjoy team sports. Because achieving their goals has been ingrained in them, they are prone to success; they excel at the things they set their hearts on, ranging from playing a musical instrument to being intellectuals. What are you? ...

How Bright Is Your Aura? My Result: Orange People who have Orange as the brightest color of their aura are good at tuning in to the feelings of others and treating them with sensitivity, and they expect others to reciprocate. Their trust in their emotional inner guide may draw them to work that is more deeply fulfilling, as opposed to work that just provides a paycheck. In their love lives, they're emotionally expressive. They may show their affection most often by sharing how they feel and asking their partners to do the same. They have an above-average ability to identify and express their feelings, particularly to romantic partners. Their advanced ability to express feelings prevents energy from getting stuck in this layer of their aura, which can help them avoid a variety of emotional and physical ailments. What are you? http://web.tickle.com/jumpto?test=auraogt&c=50652 Oh yeaaaahhhh I'm such a GREAT procastinator~ :D I get easily addicted to personality tests. LOL! Her...